Now before you think that sounds like I’m some sort of pickpocket zoning in for the steal, I’m not. What caught my attention was the photo of the beautiful elderly lady smiling a huge, genuine smile. When my eyes followed to where he was sitting, I discovered the woman also sitting there; it appeared she was his wife. They were both in their 70′s at least, if not older. Put simply, they both just looked right together, and it made me wonder about the photo in his wallet.

Did he do it because he loves her? Because he’s proud? Or because it’s just the thing to do?

I don’t carry a photo of anyone in my wallet except myself – my drivers license.

I don’t have kids so I don’t have any school photos I can cut out and put in there. I could add a photo of C, or my dog, but somehow the effort of finding a picture, printing it out and then displaying it my wallet has just never occurred to me before. I know C doesn’t have anything of me in his either, but his dog is the background on his phone.

Does that mean phone wallpapers are the wallet photos of the 00′s and 10′s?

Do you have a photo in your wallet of a loved one? If so, why?

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Tonight C is out for a boy’s night for one of his friend’s birthdays, taking one of my housemates along with him. My other housemate is in Hawaii, which meant I got the entire house alone.

Oh yeah.

Alone.

STOKED.

Needless to say I have been living it up lazy style, with a bit of housework thrown in for good measure. After all, on his days off C does a lot around the house so I’m only too happy to do the same when I can.

Tonight my evening consisted of the following:

Lazy? Definitely. Enjoyable? Absolutely.

What’s your idea of an enjoyable night alone?

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This morning I dragged myself out of bed at 5.45am to get ready to go and meet a friend and a new trainer at Kawana beach. The plan is to get super fit again and prepare myself for the event I’ll be competing in next year called “Tough Mudder“, an obstacle course lasting approximately 19km. Put simply, I have about 12 – 16 months of torture ahead; it’s going to be great!

As much as I enjoy doing exercise, actually getting myself to go and do it is by far the hardest bit; sometimes the call of the couch is far too strong. So this morning when I woke up at stupid o’clock, getting out of bed was the last thing I wanted to do. Particularly when I had a snoozing C beside me looking so warm and comfortable. Alas, I’m one of those people that hates to let others down, so I grudgingly climbed out, got dressed and left. What greeted me at the beach was the stunning view you see above.

There was no time to feel cold and tired when I got to see that. Instantly I remembered how much I loved getting up early and going for a run, when the world is quiet and so beautiful. Instantly I looked forward to the training session.

Instantly I was glad I was getting back into this again.

What’s your reason for getting out of bed in the morning?

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1. I haven’t had much motivation for anything at all lately – uni, health or fitness. This needs to change.
2. Last night I went and saw Passenger in concert at the Hi-Fi bar, where we were even treated to a duet with Kate Miller Heidke and a marriage proposal! C and I went to the concert courtesy of my sister – she bought the tickets for my birthday back in February.
3. This coming Friday I will  be wearing a full length dress for the second time in just under 2 months…the same dress in fact. It’s my cousin’s wedding, and this time I will be sure to get photos of C and I that don’t include us being intoxicated. Something worthy of being published anyway.
4. Yesterday I went shopping with C to get some clothes for me during the winter period, and from memory it’s the first time that I’ve ever been clothes shopping with him to buy clothes for me (we’ve picked up stuff for him before). He earned himself about a thousand brownies, insisting on carrying the clothes I picked up, and also pointing out things that may look good on me, including some new sunnies. I actually didn’t drag him along at all, and he seemed to enjoy finding stuff that he thought would look good on me. I really truly have struck gold with this guy!
5. I’ve discovered that writing 10 things about what’s happened to me lately is a lot harder than I expected.
6. In the next few months I will be embarking on a new fitness regime that will include a few different boot camp groups with friends, and also even pole fitness! Yes, I’ve finally given in after being talked into it by friends, and I will be learning how to swing myself around a pole stripper style. I won’t, however, be doing this in a sexy way. I like to think of it as uncoordinated retard chic. Stay tuned for pictures of bruises.
7. I’m blogging when I should be finishing off a uni assignment, or vacuuming & mopping the house. I am clearly the best procrastinator on the planet.
8. I went to the roar grand final, and got incredibly emotional about the result. I LOVE the fact that we won, don’t get me wrong, but winning from a penalty was just cruel. I knew immediately that there was going to be a lot of controversy about whether it should have been a penalty or not. I became incredibly defensive about it, and I was going to write a blog post about the way people handled themselves about it, but I think it’s best to just let it be now. Either way, it was a bit eye opening about how ignorant and rude some people can be.
9. Our back deck at home is sinking. The real estate agent sent some workmen around the other day (we rent here) who discussed with us what work would need to be done. Basically, the fence would be pulled down, the deck pulled up, and a new massive concrete slab put in place before eventually retiling the deck. If that happens, the poor dogs are going to be cooped up in the front garden for a while, which will send them mental. I’d better prepare myself for a lot more exercise for them than usual as a result.
10. I’ve got two products that I’m reviewing at the moment, and they are pretty kick-ass. Some ingrown hair serum and deoderant. Did someone tell the blogging products company that I was embarking on some sort of hygienic make-over or something? I also scored a free eyelash tint the other day! Woo!

So that’s brought you pretty much up to date. Now just to get back into the habit of blogging regularly!

A friend and I (i'm on the left) at the grand final

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So this evening I set out to get a chunk of study done. On my list, I had videos to watch and pages and pages of text to read.

Instead I organised my social life.

One of the challenges on my list of 52 in 52 for 2012 is to visit a winery. So this evening I set about creating a facebook event for the trip, and invited a bloody long list of friends. To be honest I’d be shocked if there’s more than a carload of us. The place looks amazing though, and I really can’t wait to have some nice wines, enjoy the company of whatever friends do come, and look out over the range. Check out the place I plan on visiting – Flame Hill. How amazing does it look?

But back to the point of my post.

Typically, what comes after the creation of such an event on facebook is all the discussion about it, which was how I spent the following 15mins. Then I realised how much I had procrastinated, how productive the time actually was since I was working towards a goal, and then proceeded to blog about it.

Which leads me to now.

I’m still procrastinating, yet I’m productively procrastinating. Have I invented a new term?

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Last night – netball, picking stuff up from one mate, dropping stuff off at another’s

Tonight – night at home (wee)

Wednesday – trivia with mates

Thursday – netball, games night at friends

Friday – Easter long weekend begins. Hooray.

Glad I got to spend a great weekend with C, and guess I should spend the time at home with him that I can.

What has everyone else got planned?

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1. Busy week ahead
2. A productive Saturday

In the 1.5 weeks preceeding last Saturday, I spent approximately 10 – 15mins with C alone. All other times he was entertaining a house guest, an old friend of his. They stayed up late at night together hanging out while I went to bed. When I rose the next morning to go to work C was asleep, so I wouldn’t see him until I got home that afternoon…when he was hanging out with our new house guest again.

To be fair, it wasn’t C’s fault. His friend is going through a rough patch at the moment and was very much in need of a friend. I was happy to have the friend here, and I never complained once. However, knowing that C would be away camping this week I did ask to make sure that I would get some alone time with him before he left. As it turned out the friend went home early Saturday morning, and I was lucky to get in some quality time with C over the course of Saturday and Sunday.

C arrives back home on Friday, less than 48 hours away now, and I can’t wait. Today I began planning a surprise for when he gets home (tweet 1, tweet 2) as I won’t be home until possibly 7 or 8pm Friday night due to a work function. During the course of talking to one of my other housemates (who in an unrelated story is now the recipient of a LOT of text messages from said house guest, although not quite a willing recipient mind you) I found out that said house guest will be back this Friday night.

The same day C gets home.

For fuck’s sake.

I don’t know if C knows if his mate is coming back again, as we’ve had limited conversation while he’s been away camping this week (reception is patchy). If he knows, I will have to tell him in the future that I would prefer if he kept me in the loop and told me when people were coming over. I would have also thought that C would let him know that we’re going away the following morning for the weekend, so probably not worth the visit. That may have been said, but the decision was made for him to still come, I don’t know. That’s the part I’m not liking much – not knowing.

I also don’t know if I’m being selfish or not. I understand that since I won’t get home until 7 or 8pm that night he has hours to kill socially, but as it’s my first day in seeing C since Monday I would really love to have that time alone. I also understand that we’re going away to spend the weekend together with some other friends, but that’s still not alone time. Plus it’s also not going to be the first time I will have seen him in nearly 5 days. Let me know if I’m being selfish or not, but if it’s the first time I’ve seen my boyfriend in 5 days then goddammit I want him to myself.

Now…feedback please. Am I being selfish? Is this something that I should be bringing up with C (something along the lines of “I actually didn’t want him here”). Should I just suck it up and put on a happy face when I get home on Friday? Should I bring it up with C via text before he gets home, just to find out if he knew (to be honest, I’m not a fan of the whole text messaging thing since C and I have a history of misinterpreting what the other says).

What would you do?

Related posts:

1. It’s the small things
2. I moved house and I’m buggered

OH YEAH! BACHELORETTE UNTIL FRIDAY!!

Now usually that would mean lots of girls nights, partying in our underwear having pillow fights, and general mayhem.

Or in Kelsbells land, that just means that I will be able to study for hours on end every night and not feel like I’m neglecting my other half.

Oh yeah. I’m hardcore.

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Lunch was yum but I’m full now.

I had a great weekend. What am I going to be doing this upcoming weekend? Maybe I should try to have a quiet one.

I need to do Uni this week. 2 hours a night minimum or I will get stupidly behind again.

Man, I really am full!!

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Last night we had a few friends around at our place to celebrate St Patty’s Day, plus to play some poker as we hadn’t played in such a long time.

What a great night.

It started with a few games of Football, then progressed to a card drinking game, then poker, then back to the drinking game for another few rounds.

The rules are simple: draw a card from the deck, and that card corresponded with the rules on the whiteboard. There were games within the games, like Fuzzy Duck and Whizz Bang, speaking games that I clearly fail at. Most of my penalty drinks came from those games. Others included thumbs on table, where you had the power to put your thumb on the table, last to notice and do the same had a penalty shot. New rule meant you could make up your own rule (we banned the use of right hands, swearing, and a “hand on head” game similar to thumbs on table).

It was brilliant, and so much fun.

Needless to say that game will be coming on our Thailand trip with us, and will even make an appearance on the plane. Within reason.

Today passed in a blur of sleeping and thinking about sleep, as we all had some pretty sore heads. We also spent $80 on McDonald’s for everyone for breakfast, a mean feat.

How was everyone else’s weekend?

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Why can’t I just let people do what they want to do?

Why do I question everything?

Why don’t they understand the points I’m trying to make?

Why don’t I understand the points they’re trying to make?

How long until it’s all better again?

How did they know to play that song on the radio at that exact moment?

When will he be back?

So many questions…no easy answers. But today I learned that the way we react to things is a choice we all make.

Time to make better choices. Time to change my habits. Time to let things truly go. Time to really let myself be vulnerable. Time to think about perceptions.

I ask why and when…but thankfully I still have time to make a change.

Sorry for my vagueness.

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I was overdue a gushy post, so here it is. I couldn’t be more lucky right now.

Normal whinging shall now resume.

Related posts:

1. A small rant about house guests

More often than not, immediately after writing a post about my relationship (whether good or bad), someone usually says to me “does C know you’ve written about this?”.

He does, and he doesn’t.

He knows I blog, and he knows I write about our relationship. He’s read several of the posts, and he knows my style of writing. I’ve asked him what he thinks about my blogging of our relationship, and he genuinely has no concerns about it whatsoever. “Do as you like”, he says “I don’t mind”. The first time I told him I’d written about him, I stated that in no way would I ever reveal his identity on here (for his own privacy reasons), and would I ever approach a blog just to speak negatively of him. even then, I don’t think he would care. He trusts me to write fair and to be honest about each situation, and it’s those traits that I pride myself on. I would never disrespect him on here; it’s just not my style. I don’t write posts with the aim of venting anger at people, or calling them names. I write on here with the intention of working out what’s going on in my head, to analyse the situation, and to share my experiences with others potentially going through the same thing or who have experience and can share that with me.

C knows that, and that’s why he has no problem with it.

I actually had this conversation with someone again the other day, so last night approached the topic with him again just to make sure there still wasn’t an issue. There wasn’t, and he actually asked what had made me so insecure as to ask him again. Oops.

So to put it on the record, yes C knows about these posts. No he doesn’t know exact content, but if he wants to read them he knows he just has to ask. I have nothing to hide.

I love him, he loves me, and he trusts me. That’s all that matters.

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I’m a wee bit tired now. I think I deserve to chill out on the bed for half an hour now, don’t you?

After all, I need to save some energy. I’m going to see Donavon Frankenreiter tonight with some friends.

Related posts:

1. I think I need a cleaning schedule, or something.
2. A productive Saturday

It’s only been a few weeks since we last went grocery shopping, but oh boy did we hit those shops hard tonight! $425 later, and we have about a month’s worth of food, plus weed kiler, plus some bits and bobs for around the house (hooks to hang up stuff etc) (those hooks only cost $1 by the way). If I see the inside of another grocery store in the next week or two I think I might scream. I’m pretty sure my wallet will attack me, and my EFTPOS card will just up and run away. Thus I’m planning on steering clear of Woolworths for a while.

This evening was fun. Not. We dropped off our iPhones for repairs (my centre button is playing up) then came home to unpack the semi-trailer’s worth of groceries before making dinner. During all of that, Joe, our housemate, managed to slice open his foot on one of the rocks underneath our back deck while saving one of the dog’s balls (nothing rude there, I’m talking about tennis balls). Basically, our deck juts out a few metres or so over a canal, and at low tide we have a bit of beach and a lot of rocks with oysters. Not nice.

Well, the beach bit is. And the water. The dogs love to play in the water.

So while C had managed to help Joe climb back up onto the deck, wash his foot out and bandage it, I went and hosed down the deck where blood was beginning to stain the tiles. Afterwards, we returned to our cold dinner.

Hmm…as I write this I’m realising that I’m sound a bit grumpy. Perhaps I should go to bed soon.

I’ve also spent the evening trying to figure out why my kindle refuses to connect to the online store, which despite my best efforts it still refuses to do. I have a feeling it may have to do with the fact that it was still registered under my sister’s account (she bought the kindle for me as a present for Christmas). She’s since unregistered it for me, but it still won’t connect. I’ll try again in the morning, and after that I’ll give customer service a call.

Shit. Speaking of phone calls that reminds me that I was meant to call a costume shop today to organise a Lara Croft costume for a hen’s party this weekend. Now that I think about it, I think the chances are extremely slim of there being a non-slutty version of a Lara Croft costume that will actually fit these hips of mine. I can’t say I want to go looking like this:

Image from http://greatblogabout.com

Annoyingly, even with my sized hips and an incredible lack of cellulite despite the size of her thighs, Angelina still manages to look kinda cool. I think she’d need to see someone about those tits though. They don’t look healthy.

Right, I think it’s bed time. When you talk about a fat Angelina Jolie getting boob surgery you know it’s time for your head to meet the pillow for the evening. Goodnight all!

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Ok, well I was. He just got home.

So why am I still typing this? Cause he’s currently settling in and I’m just chilling out. I just gave him his present, which was a membership to the QLD Reds, his favourite Rugby Union team. It’s a non-ticketed membership since his roster is so tough to work around, but it still has plenty of perks to it, one of those being early access to tickets to the Bledisloe Cup in Brisbane, something I know he’s definitely keen on attending. I was incredibly close to getting him an airport express, but in the end decided that sport was more up his alley than a gadget. I think once I explain to him what an airport express is he will probably want to get one anyway…so win win I guess?

It’s a bit unfair that he finished work at 10pm so we didn’t get to spend a nice night out dining together, but there’s always next time. Instead, my housemates and I (one of whom is single, the other sharing my pain with a partner busy until later) walked into town and had dinner and cocktails together. It was still pretty darn fun!

In other news, we finally have ADSL set up at home which means it won’t be so painful for me to try and blog. It also means that I’ll be charging through updating my photos and 52 in 52 list. I know you’ve been missing all of those!!

So how was your Valentine’s day?

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About midday on Thursday (Australia Day, and a public holiday for most), C came down with a terrible virus. He had the shakes, a high fever, and eventually got the runs. He was barely able to stay awake, and lost his entire appetite. Within 24hrs he had dropped 5kg. I immediately kicked into the “caring girlfriend” routine and fussed over him, waking him periodically to take his medication and to make him drink fluids to keep him hydrated. When I wasn’t there, one of our housemates, Joe, stepped in to keep an eye on him.

Needless to say, I cancelled my plans of going away with some friends camping to stay home and look after C instead. I also had to cancel C’s weekend on the Gold Coast for a birthday party, tell some friends not to come over on Friday night, and tell his boss he wouldn’t be in on Saturday morning.

Today was incredibly low key. I woke around 10.30am (after finally going to sleep at 2am, too caught up researching the upcoming Thailand trip) and lazed around the house in my pyjamas. Mum stopped past quickly at midday, then I showered and changed. A few hours were spent as a domestic goddess, washing clothes, weeding and general housework, then I retired to the couch. Where I now sit.

I was also meant to go to Laser Force this afternoon with some friends, but unfortunately the place was closed when they arrived so it got postponed until tomorrow night. I won’t be able to make it as I have netball, so bummer for me. I was also going to go to their house to watch the Australian Open Men’s Singles Final, but my lazy gene kicked in and I piked again.

I have managed to climb out of my indent in the couch to make some banana bread, my first time making it. Hopefully it turns out, I will be sure to post some photos! I also had grand plans of washing and straightening my hair tonight, but at this stage I think that’s out. Maybe tomorrow night after netball…

So I hope you all had a most exciting weekend! I’m happy to report C has improved to the point that he is sitting on the couch, and has stayed awake for most of today, but he is still barely eating anything and doesn’t stray far from the bathroom. Yet he is improving, and that’s fantastic to see.

Next weekend will be more high energy, I’m sure. Now just to start planning something!

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Oxley in 2011 after the devastating floods in January

Around this time last year my home state of Queensland got hit hard by mother nature. There were cyclones and widespread flooding, taking lives and causing immense damage. After the floods, thousands upon thousands of volunteers hit the streets to help with the cleanup. I was one of them, going to a friend’s place where water had reached over 1m high on the second story of his house. We spent two days salvaging what we could from his house, and cleaning anything that could be saved.

There are people still suffering from those floods today whether it’s rebuilding their houses or still mourning for those who never came back.

And now it’s raining again.

I know that I won’t be the only one who will be a little anxious by the fact that the land is already saturated from rain and there has been more forecast for at least another 5 days. I think they have predicted about 150mm; hopefully we are well equipped to handle it. Worst case scenario, I know the Australia spirit will be there yet again ready to lend a hand as soon as it comes time. We’re like little worker ants in that way, we just don’t ever give up.

But please, mother nature, give us a break this year?

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But it’s just the small things where I realize I have particular favorites:

It’s the loo cubicle that gets me. I don’t know what drew me to it. From what I can tell, it flushes the same way as others. It’s the same design as the others. Yet it’s the first one I head to, and if it’s occupied I do feel a little out of sorts.

Not enough to throw someone out of my cubicle of course

I could get poo on my hands.

Not my poo either.

Yuk.

Do you have anything in particular that you have a “favorite” of? That you immediately gravitate towards?

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So how did I spend my Sunday?

Right now I’m relaxing on the deck with a glass of wine while inside C makes some pork chops for dinner.

After a few months of stress, days like this just remind me how lucky I am.

I’m living the dream.

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